A few weeks ago I wrote about how I’m getting married for the second time (huzzah!). And like this second time around marriage will be very different from the first, this second wedding will be dramatically different from the first.
Though my first marriage didn’t work out, I will always have fond memories of my first wedding. Like all first time brides, I was swept up in wedding fever. We went all out! (And by we I mean me, my mom, sisters, and aunts.) Every detail was attended to, from the flowers lining the aisle to the thematic escort cards to the pillar decorations. Nothing was overlooked. And the day of everything was perfect. The location was beautiful, the food was amazing, the drinks never stopped flowing, and everyone had a good time! It was a wonderful wedding! And it cost an arm and a leg.
This time around our budget is literally 1/6 of my first wedding budget and, unlike last time, the fiance and I are footing the bill. So things are going to be pared down just a bit. There will be no fancy location, lavish buffet, or unending alcohol. This wedding it going to be simple and home-made.
The location: our backyard
The food: food trucks
Flowers, Decorations, Escort cards, Invitations, Photo Booth, Guest Book: DIY!!!
Photography: Stacee Lianna, who has miraculously agreed to work within our tiny budget! (When she said yes I nearly started crying!) http://staceelianna.com/
Unlike the last wedding there will be no giant white dress. I won’t be trooping my friends and family to endless bridal boutiques. I won’t even be going to a dress shop myself! The dress will not be poofy and princessy. It will not be dramatic and oh-so elegant. It will not be bright white. Now, I don’t begrudge anyone wearing a white dress to their second wedding, it’s just not for me. Like this wedding, this dress needs to be simple, inexpensive, and totally me.
The other hitch is that we’ve decided to get married at the courthouse on a friday and then have a reception the next day. So I need two dresses (and my dress budget didn’t get magically bigger! I have to get two dress for the same amount. Or I can wear something I already have….yeah right.)
What I really want a dress like this:
However, $700 is a little out of budget. Ok, it’s a lot out of my budget! But it is so perfect. Sigh…On to the real hunt.
To fit in my budget I’ve been shopping my favorite stores, especially the ones where I have credit (so that I can both use rewards and earn them).
First, I ordered this dress from Piperlime.com
This dress is perfect for an elegant courthouse ceremony! (I also ordered this dress with a promo code and all of my rewards from the last year, netting me a 50% discount.) I would be very Joan Holloway in this dress!
Unfortunately, the dress didn’t fit quite right. The waist hit just below my bust-line, which made the hips hit around my waist. Being alternately too tight and too loose made me look like I was wearing a dress from junior high after a growth spurt. Not exactly the look I was going for, and definitely not Joan.
So I ordered two dresses from Nordstrom, figuring one would fit the bill for a courthouse wedding.
Lovely right? Well, the pleating just below the waist made my child bearing hips look even wider. Additionally there are hundreds of shiny sequins that don’t show up in the picture, which made me look something like a Vegas lounge singer. Not quite right for my wedding.
On the dress number 2:
Again, this dress is beautiful! I loved it! And then I put it on. I now resembled a sausage being stuffed into its casing. Maybe the lesson here was to stop ordering sheath dresses? Despite my apparent mental self-image, I am not a size 6 with slender hips and small bust. I am a very curvy size 10/12! There is an 11 inch difference between my hips and waist, and a 10 inch difference between my bust and waist. Sheath dresses are just not going to do it!
After another futile shopping trip to Macy’s, I began to worry that I would end up wearing a burlap sack! The fiance kindly told me he’d happily marry me in my pjs, so I needed to stop stressing.
While that is a very sweet thing to say, I’m not sure I completely believe him. I did, however, lighten up a bit and start looking for something simpler, more fitting to my body, and just more me. I didn’t need a knockout dress for a wedding ceremony with the man I love and our immediate families. They’ll be happy no matter what I wear. To that end, I’ll be happy no matter what I wear.
With that in mind, I think I found a dress. I tried it on this morning. It fits perfectly. It’s simple, it’s appropriate, and it is totally me. Hopefully the fiance will agree! If he does, I’ll let you guys in on the dress this weekend. If not, back to the drawing board. Finger’s crossed!